Still here?

I still seem to be here. I’ve been retired/laid off/unemployed for a year now. I’m surprised how easily I got used to not working. But then I’m rather lazy. I do still fret that I don’t have enough money to really pull this off. After all, if I live to be 80, I’ve got 23 years to go. And if I think of what stuff cost twenty-three years ago, the reality of inflation is scary.
But what puzzles me is that several times in my life I’ve had turning points. Some big, some rather minor in the grand scheme of things, but times in my life when my life changed and I had a moment when I felt as though I were waking from a dream. All those assumptions slipping away and leaving me with the ability to see as if with a clarity that made everything that I saw before the disjointed forced perspective of a dream. But I have not had that moment since retiring. I haven’t felt that moment of waking up and being renewed. And that in itself is a little scary.